NEW DAY NEW LESSON » Feel Good, Lesson of the Day, Life Happens, Religion » Coincidences? Nope-it's all for a reason.
Coincidences? Nope-it's all for a reason.
Warning: if you don’t believe that things in life have a purpose or a reason, you may not want to continue reading this.
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Okay, now that my disclaimer is out of the way and only the believers are left I can continue. When I say believers I am referring to those of us who believe that life is not just a random jumble but that life has an order, a sense and a purpose to it.
Of course there are those of us, myself included, who believe in God and are not ashamed to admit it. Okay, I will come right out and say that I am proud to believe in God and higher powers.
I was just reading a blog post yesterday over at Sleep is for the Weak about people being hesitant to talk about religion on blogs, but I think it is fine. Everyone just has to learn to respect each others opinions. Or maybe I am just a new blogger, so I don’t know what I have stepped into yet. Am hoping that my naiveness and belief in people’s goodness will serve me okay.
So anyways, back to coincidences.
I personally don’t believe there is such a thing. It’s always been my motto. I think my friends and family are probably sick of me saying, there is no such thing as a coincidence. Oh well-that’s their problem I guess.
I think you might not always see a connection between things occurring in your life, but many times somewhere along the road, you might have that epiphany as to why something happened. Maybe some horrible event left you stranded somewhere and it was there you met your soul mate. Maybe it was a stranger’s smile that gave you a boost of self confidence on your way to a job interview. Or maybe some random fortune cookie got you thinking and prompted an action by you. There are even sites like this one that has lists of interesting coincidences.
(Photo courtesy of Robert S. Donovan )
It can be a random comment or it can be something as stressful as a disease that changes your whole perspective on life. About six years ago I was hospitalized with mild hemiparesis. The doctors had no idea what the problem was. Those 10 days were some of the worst in my life. They were racked with fear and worry. (They were also filled with reading 7 books, staying in pj’s all day, not cooking or cleaning and getting served 3 meals a day, but really I was worried.)
It was only a few years later that I realized that my illness or “dis-ease” was the best thing that could have happened to me. (And before someone comments, my kids and husband are also the best things that happened to me, but a different category of best thing).
That hospitalization led me to alternative medicine professionals and others who changed my whole view on life. It has been a process of quite a few years, but it sure as heck was the disease that was the catalyst. Again, no coincidence.
I am the kind of person who is spontaneous and maybe sometimes a bit too naive. Most of the time, when it comes to people and emotions, I am a good judge of character. Even more so if it is someone I don’t know at all, or not very well.
So it is not a surprise to me when I suddenly hear or read something from someone and feel that the person was led into my life at the moment for a reason. Sometimes it is the message in their words-written or verbal. Sometimes I am meant to connect with the person and open up to them-both for myself and for them.
I have been chatting on the internet for about 3 years now and have made quite a nice group of online virtual friends. Some of these friends I have spoken to, one I have actually met, and quite a few I correspond with by email or *horror* snail mail. I got to the forum I chat on by accident. I was looking on the site for something else and happened across the forum. Again a “coincidence”. Uh uh! I don’t think so.
(Photo courtesy of vistamommy )
It was on this forum that I stumbled onto that I have been helped and helped others. I have made friends. I have come to understand cultures and religions other than my own. Others have come to understand things about my culture and religion.
It was also through some of these friends that I was exposed to the world of blogging. The blogging that has become a source of great satisfaction for me. I have also in just a few weeks in blogland, made quite a few more like minded virtual friends who I really enjoy corresponding with.
Even just yesterday, I happened across a blog I have never read before. With blog reading it is kind of like a blog to blog treasure hunt. You start with one blog you like, click on that blogger’s favorite blogs and then on and on. Focus Susie! You are digressing!
Okay back to the story about this blog. The blog’s author is a single mum named Nicola. The post was one that intuitively sparked something in me and I asked her to contact me by email which she did. Being total strangers, LOL, we of course hit it off right away. The emails that followed were for both of us the exact hit over the head we both needed at this moment. We both have many common views and we both believe that this connection is not a coincidence.
There is a beautiful poem by an anonymous author that goes like this:
A Reason, a Season, or a Lifetime
People come into your life for a reason, a season, or
a lifetime. When you figure out which one it is, you
will know what to do for each person.
When someone is in your life for a REASON . . . It is
usually to meet a need you have expressed. They have
come to assist you through a difficulty, to provide you
with guidance and support, to aid you physically,
emotionally, or spiritually. They may seem like a
godsend, and they are! They are there for the reason
you need them to be.
Then, without any wrong doing on your part, or at an
inconvenient time, this person will say or do something
to bring the relationship to an end.
Sometimes they die.
Sometimes they walk away.
Sometimes they act up and force you to take a stand.
What we must realise is that our need has been met, our
desire fulfilled, their work is done. The prayer you
sent up has been answered. And now it is time to move on.
When people come into your life for a SEASON . . .
Because your turn has come to share, grow, or learn.
They bring you an experience of peace, or make you laugh.
They may teach you something you have never done.
They usually give you an unbelievable amount
of joy. Believe it! It is real! But, only for a season.
LIFETIME relationships teach you lifetime lessons; things
you must build upon in order to have a solid emotional
foundation. Your job is to accept the lesson, love the
person, and put what you have learned to use in all
other relationships and areas of your life. It is said
that love is blind but friendship is clairvoyant.
I believe that even the season and lifetime relationships are for a reason. Every coincidence is like the swell a tiny little a rock makes when it is thrown into the ocean. Everything is connected. I believe everything happens for a reason.
No one is going to convince me that there is such a thing as a mere coincidence. In my book, everything truly does have a reason, even if at times I have no idea what that may be.
So next time something less than pleasant happens to you, instead of bemoaning your fate, think positively. Remember it is no coincidence you are going through this event right now. You never know, you might even be lucky enough to be able to look back and see the blessing it has become.
P.S. You don’t think it is a coincidence you read this today do you? *wink wink*
Written by Susie
I am me and also lots of other things like a wife, a mother, a daughter, a sister, a daughter in law, a sister in law, a friend, an oncology nurse, a blogger, a life coach in training, an avid book reader, a chauffeur, a chef, a shopper, a maid and on some days a bit overwhelmed. On this blog I share my journey of striving to see the best in everyone and everything. Strive, because I don't always manage to. Yup, I am human. I would love to have you join me in learning lessons in positivity from life.
Filed under: Feel Good, Lesson of the Day, Life Happens, Religion · Tags: coincidences, disease, email, friends, reasons, virtual
18 Responses to "Coincidences? Nope-it's all for a reason."
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I think you make great points here. I was diagnosed with lupus about 7 years ago. It was a scary diagnosis however it answered so many questions about my life, my health and all the things I had been through in my past. But, having lupus has opened all sorts of new avenues for me. I have had the chance to speak and share what it’s like to have this illness and how God has used the messiness that is my life to create beauty and grace on a number of levels. I have learned a bout myself how much I can handle and that I am stronger then I ever imagined I could be. And, it has taught me who I can truly count on in my life. so, no I don’t wish Lupus on anyone nor do I enjoy having this disease. but, I was given a gift in this illness. i have learned to enjoy every moment that I can in my life, to let those I love know every day how much i love them, and to focus on the things that I love and not stress so much on the mudane and ridiculous! Great blog! I hope you will visit my blog sometime. i have this feeling that you and I are alot alike!
It is so nice to see people really take the adversities in their lives and make it into positives.
I don’t have much time now, but I have bookmarked your blog. Will definitely have a read when I get a chance.
Thanks for sharing.
I think you can talk about anything you like on your blog to be honest, religion, sex, what ever. It’s your space after all.
My feelings on this post are so mixed. i am a little bag of contradictions. This really resonated with me:
‘I believe that even the season and lifetime relationships are for a reason. Every coincidence is like the swell a tiny little a rock makes when it is thrown into the ocean. Everything is connected. I believe everything happens for a reason.’
And yet I am an atheist. I do not believe in God, not even a little bit unsure. I do not know what to make of it. i don’t believe in a heaven or a hell and yet i have suspicions that ghosts probably exist. It is all a mystery to me. Maybe it’s better way? i don’t know.
I always wondered how you can someone can believe in ghosts but not in a higher power. It is fascinating for me actually.
I know what I personally believe in but it is a feeling not so much something I can explain. Am sure there are many qualified people who can do a better job of having that kind of discussion with you.
One thing that someone did tell me as an illustration to prove that the creation of something like our world could not have been a random event is this:
Take a pen and then cut the part that holds the ink and let it splash on a piece of paper. What are the odds that the ink will spell out something meaningful like I love you mom? So much more so the earth and human and all our layers of complexities. Just a thought I was once explained.
Either way-everyone is entitled to their views and beliefs and their own journey in life.
Good for you for sharing your beliefs like this!
I admire you for having so much certainty in the way you view the world. I’m always crippled by so much doubt and uncertainty!
I’m afraid I don’t share you view, sometimes I think some things just HAPPEN, there is no reason, but at the same time I ascribe to the idea that it’s always possible to pull something positive out of situations and events, no matter how small.
I was very ill for many years and I can’t believe that was for a reason, it’s just screwy genetics, but I do believe that the lessons I learnt from it and the person that it made me are positive things to come out of it.
Does that make sense? I guess it’s a destiny vs. make your own fate type argument!
Thanks for this Susie – I love a post that gets me thinking
Just so you understand-I also have my moments of doubt as well. That is what life is all about.
While I believe in this, I also am a person who likes to control things and know things for certain so it has been a journey and tough for me.
One of the things that got me asking questions was my fear of death. I can’t say I have completely kicked that one yet, probably because no one can tell me for sure 100% what goes on after we pass on, but am becoming more comfortable with the concept because I know there is an afterlife and a good one.
As far as things happening just by accident as opposed to things being planned. The book Your Soul’s Plan by Robert Schwartz (aside from the ones I had posted in my comment to your post about praying) is one that will probably also get you thinking. ( http://www.yoursoulsplan.com/ )
I think we find out destiny in life by making our own fate happen. (How is that for a play on your words lol)
Your writing in part prompted this post-so you get some of the credit!
Very thought provoking post – and so well expressed. I’d love to share your feeling that there is a pattern, some greater purpose. Sometimes I do. I do believe, like you say, that we meet people for a reason, but I can’t yet make the leap to it being part of a wider plan. I read ‘Why Bad Things Happen to God People’ when I was younger in an attempt to understand. I think a l lot of terrible things are random events. I do, however, believe that undergoing a traumatic illness or near death experience can give you a totally different perspective. There are so many stories of people who have, to take one example, been in a terrible car accident and broken their backs and had to lay in bed for a year who have then come out and done something wonderful and realised the true value in life.
Thanks for a great post.
First I want to apologize. Somehow your comment got into my spam cue and I didn’t notice and didn’t realize I had to check what goes into the spam. So forgive me for taking so long to respond.
Actually of all the books I have read-I personally did not really like the one called “why bad things happen to good people”. Maybe because i didn’t necessarily agree.
I would suggest Many lives, Many Masters by Brian Weiss, or soul agreements by Richard Schwartz or the Evolution Angel by Todd Michael 9or Dr. Michael Abrams-same person).
Whatever you do believe it is true that you can learn something from everything.
Thanks for reading.
We have the same motto
- I’m only happy I posted mine a few days ago otherwise I may have been taken for copying!
Nice to see I’m not the only one
Off for a look at yours! LOL-hope you don’t think I copied!
Just had a read. Here is the link for the those who want to read it. Very good post!
Hi Susie. Great post. I share your views that there are no such things as coincidences – it’s just sometimes we can’t see the bigger picture and know the meaning of everything that appears to just fall into our path for no apparent reason at that moment in time. And typically out of my greatest challenges in life have come my greatest blessings. And greatest friendships.
I’ll admit there have been so many serendipitous things in my life. Maybe I’m an incurable romantic but it seems strange that I met a man in Paris, met him by co-incidence the same day, and married him two years later! By the same token some pretty awful things have happened that I can find no reason for, absolutely no upside whatsoever. What to make of these? I honestly don’t know Susie. I liked your post. Reading it feels a little like listening to you chat (though I’ve not met you) which is lovely. Glad I read this today, of all days. xx
I too am a believer in its all for a reason. I guess that’s one of the sentiments I expressed in my mottos rambling today.
Good things happen for a reason, bad things too. I think sometimes we can’t see the reason for the bad because we think we didn’t deserve it, but it’s not about deserving it or not, it’s about needing it, now or in the future.
I’ve had horrible, wretched things happen to me and those I love. Many times, years later I have seen how the history created from those horrible, wretched things has helped our present and our future, or instituted some change that needed to be or helped someone else.
I don’t believe in pre-destiny but I do believe that we are created to make order from the chaos.
oh my goodness. You are right. I know you are right because I am here. I wrote this the other day http://eviegeorge.blogspot.com/2010/02/friendship.html
and it is like I needed to read this post to make me see it is OK. Those friends who I sometimes feel bad about not keeping in touch with are how you described them.
I feel about a stone lighter after reading this.
So glad! I answered on your blog.
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